"She's My Hero"

This is an essay my mom wrote and posted on her blog today, It's All Relative. You should check out her blog if you haven't already! What she wrote about me is so touching and I am so grateful to have a mother like her. I'm also glad I have made her proud of me.

Here we are in April of 2010

She's My Hero

This is the story of a little girl who came into my life many years ago. From the day she was born, she always had delicate features. When I would hug her to myself, I would always marvel at how fragile her bone structure felt in my arms and I would usually say as I hugged, "you are so little."

One Christmas when she was about six years old, we saw the movie, "The Little One", which is the story of a tiny little donkey who was given an important task - he was to carry Mary to Bethlehem. That was the day I began calling my daughter Little One. I called her that a lot through childhood and even through her college years. But I stopped when she married. I guess I thought she had outgrown the name. Even though she still has those delicate features and fine bone structure, today she is a poised young woman and the childhood nickname sounds a little out of place so I only call her that in times of extreme stress.

My Little One became a mother for the first time in 2003. For six years she thoroughly enjoyed mothering that little boy. I watched her grow as she seriously embraced this new role. There were many fun times during those six years as well as several trying life episodes.

After several months of trying to enlarge her family, she not only was blessed with pregnancy, she found out there would be two babies this time. A few months later, she learned that these two new babies were both boys. How could she be more blessed? She was going to be the mother of three boys. She would be the queen of an all-male household.

I watched that tummy grow and grow and grow, and worried that it could not possibly grow any larger

Then the surprise. Labor pains were coming sooner than they should have. Water broke. The rush to the hospital and the emergency C-section.

Then the uncertainty. One baby was small but just fine. One baby was small and had a problem. He was rushed to another hospital for surgery. Daddy went with this baby while Mommy and brother remained.

Then the heartbreak. The diagnosis for Brett was cystic fibrosis. But my Little One has a quiet strength that rises up when called upon. She has a fierce love and determination to give everything within her to her own little ones.

Its been almost two years now since that day, and I'm even more amazed with my Little One than ever before. She has been with Brett through more surgeries. Each surgery holding that unspoken fear that he might not survive. She has nursed him through multiple infections that have weakened his little lungs. She has made an untold number of trips to the CF clinic. In 24 months there have been 12 hospitalizations. When he is home, the medicine administration and breathing treatments take up several hours of her day. All the while, there is another baby to take care of and a 6-year-old that still needs mother's guidance and caring.

She runs a small enterprise..and its a lot more than just cooking the meals and washing the clothes. She is a dedicated planner, organizer, decision maker, psychologist, teacher, nurse, life coach, life partner, comforter, chauffer, cheerleader, and confidant. Doing all of this and more while she caters to the schedules, preferences, and needs of the people she loves. And she even manages a few minutes to call her mother once in a while.

Yes, at the end of the day, she sees the results of her efforts. She sees it reflected in the eyes of her husband and children. She sees it in the happy smiles on the faces of her children. She hears it in the joyful ring of their laughter. She feels it with each set of arms that hug her tightly each night.

Now this young woman not only handles it all, she handles it all with grace and dignity. I watch her. I watch her juggle all of this and listen to her hum while she works. I see the tiredness in her face, then I marvel at how she can overcome that fatigue and give those boys a sweet smile while patiently providing them whatever it is they need at the moment. She has plenty of love to go around.

I watch my Little One these days. I watch her prepare different foods based on each boy's desires and needs. I watch her find the way to play with each boy at their own level. This means playing sports with one, trucks with another, and baby games with another. I watch her dispense the medications. I watch her give the baths. And I watch her change diapers and change soiled outfits all day long.

All of this happen while she spends hours and energy taking care of a CF baby. I see the hurt on her face that she can't cure the disorder for him. I see the worry on her face that each hospitalization and each new health challenge brings. I ask her how she manages the fears and hurts. She simply replies that she is just doing everything she can to make his days as healthy as possible. She's one absolutely amazing woman. She's my Little One. She's my hero.